“Ultimately you are in charge – you can change the narrative. It’s up to you what kind of day you have and your future is not in the hands of your employer”
ESTHER KUKU
“It’s impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live your life so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all. In which case you fail by default”
JK Rowling is not someone that I would ever have imagined myself quoting, but these are liberating words.
Sometimes with the best intentions in the world, we make mistakes, we say the wrong things or we throw in the towel and walk away, when really we should have been focused and stayed.
I was in an amazing job, travelling all over the world and basically living the professional dream – then a position with more money and at a better title, in the same field, came up and I left the dream job. I deeply regretted it, what ensued was three years of challenge and difficulty. But I got through it and I stayed until it was right to leave even when it was hard, because I learned to understand that if something doesn’t challenge you it doesn’t change you. Plus, even though this wasn’t the dream job, I wasn’t going to make the same mistake of leaving prematurely twice.
During this period I learnt to value myself, even when others didn’t see my value. And, I now ask myself who is ultimately in charge here?
Life will not always be easy or fair. Our focus must be on what we can control – and that’s our response to life’s events. Determine what your responsibility is in any given situation.
Some people are consumed with what doesn’t seem to be working, constantly amplifying issues and problems in their work environment. Their full attention is given to problems and they’re blinded to anything else – the outcome is stress and frustration. Other people experience similar challenges but they don’t give their power away to them – they remain in charge of their response and manage their emotions.
Ultimately you are in charge – you can change the narrative. It’s up to you what kind of day you have and your future is not in the hands of your employer. I love the phrase personal development – it means we have to take ownership of our progress. If someone isn’t celebrating who you are – celebrate yourself. Yes of course you can move on – but move on when you’re ready and don’t allow a negative circumstance to guide your decision.
In fact, it’s probably not a good idea to jump off a ship in the middle of a storm…
Another important lesson I have learnt and this is very much still a journey is that it’s important to serve. Senior managers need staff they can rely on and trust. They are human beings too and will have their own frustrations. Be helpful, kind, nice – even if you don’t feel like it. This is about you taking charge, ownership and a good dose of humility.
Try not to leave a job or quit a business because it’s hard. And, if you have done that it’s fine, many of us have been there. A familiar phrase is that people don’t leave companies they leave managers – well that doesn’t have to be you…You can make it work – take charge. Make the situation you’re in work for you and in time the sun, moon and stars will eventually line up!